Lily Belle

Hey! Friend! Heeey!

I seriously dropped the ball for a few months! I had too much going on and too little focus to write anything that would've made sense to anyone (including me!)

So where do I start? Oh right, I HAVE A BABY! I can't believe it to be honest, she will be two months on the 24th and I still don't really believe she is mine!

In hindsight, being pregnant was a super strange experience, I liked it, don't get me wrong, but it is almost superpower-ish. I mean, growing another human in your belly! and then popping it out! and then feeding it with your body! It is really crazy. Awesome crazy. But crazy.... Crazy? I think crazy.
The emotions ran high from the moment I peed on that stick, expectations, thoughts, fears, hopes etc etc. Then, when the big due date came and went, it was more like 'WHAT. is. HAPPENING.' and then, when birth started to kick in it was like 'WHAT. is. HAPPENING'.  And then, when my babe popped out it was like 'WHAA...' and I fell crazy in love.

Motherhood.
It's weird. It is almost like you belong to a tribe all of a sudden. You are now allowed to give tips to other parents without being that a-hole with no kids giving pointers on how to anything baby.
It's a ROLLER coaster of emotions and actions. The first four weeks were like a hurricane had swept me up and spat me out, leaving me not knowing where up and down is. Then I gradually found my brain again.

I read a quote somewhere that your baby is brought to you to teach you something. I believe it!
I've never been the one to plan too far in advance or need to stick to a plan rigidly but I do have expectations of a day. Already in the short amount of 8 weeks of her life I had to learn to throw that right out the window. One day is never the same as the other, she surely keeps me on my toes!

And the amount of advice and books there are out there! I read a few too many tips and 'ways' to parent. I was taking all that advice a little bit to seriously. After trying hard to figure out what I want to do I just realised I gotta go with my gut. There is no other way for me to parent. I can't read a book and then apply it to my child. My new tribe of moms have been a greater help than any book or website I have read so far. My kid and I, we'll work it out. After all, us humans have been around a long time.

Now, I live life day to day, soak in all the wonderful new faces and sounds this little creature makes and try to get as much sleep as I can!

Hurray!

Oh Baby!

Giving up our life and all our belongings to start a fresh new adventure, only to find out we are starting fresh in many more ways than expected was well, unexpected. 
I have decided to share some of my pregnancy thoughts with you today. Pregnancy is a miraculous and wonderful time but can also be tough and confusing...

Once officially pregnant, some people really want to share stories that they have either heard or experienced that are really more fear instilling than empowering in any way. (no thanks!)

Sleeping is a bit tougher than when there wasn't a big belly in the way.

Some people feel that now is the perfect time to give me direction in my eating, sleeping and exercise habits.

Swelling of the fingers and toes have started to kick in (but hey, at least they are looking young, right?) 

Some people like to comment on the size of my belly 'THAT still has months to go? There is only one in there, right?' (thank you so much for bringing that to my attention, I didn't feel big and uncomfortable until you said that)

Clothes are a little harder to find in this weather of heat hot warm sizzling sunshine

Some people like to show their support in 'feeling sorry' for me- as in, 'you poor thing you are pregnant' (oh... I thought this was a time to be excited and happy about? no? uhhh... shit. what now?)

NOW. Let's forget all the silly comments and annoying questions and come to the good parts, shall we?

Most people are so excited for me that I feel very supported and loved.

I can still walk around without reaaaally waddling (yes! For real)

Most people treat me so thoughtfully, I might want to be pregnant for ever (where can I buy those fake bellies they use in movies?)

I look at life a little bit differently than I had before, everything is more special.

When I feel this little worm squirming I feel so overwhelmed thinking 'how is it possible to love someone already so much you haven't even met yet!?' 

I get to visit every public toilet in Singapore!

Life slowed down a lot and I've become calmer and turned more inwards. 

All my old t-shirts are now really sexy belly shirts (SCORE!)

I've had a few mood swings (shocker, right?) with some well deserved pregnancy rage and a week here and there where I thought the world will end because I am so sad over nothing, but over all I just feel really grateful to be able to experience this. This little baby, that we have made will be my baby for the rest of my life. My little squirt that I can tickle, tease, cuddle, kiss and see grow every single day. What. a. blessing. 

Moving in

We have found an apartment! Right by the botanical gardens, a really cute character-filled 'older' building with a much loved tropical feel to it. Our view out the window is greenery filled with the most amazing palm trees! We are very happy here to say the least.

Looking back about six months ago, we gave up almost everything we had in our Berlin apartment and promised to live minimalistic, so far? Success! We have a two bedroom, two bathroom. In one bedroom we have a shelf, thats it. In the other bedroom we have a bed, a side table, a laundry basket and a shelf. Not bad, right? In the living room we have a couch, a coffee table, a chair, a shelf, a dining table and a smaller cupboard. That is all the furniture we own and it feels great. The shelves are empty, the cupboards are empty and the walls are empty. The last one we need to change ASAP. Also a few plants will do this place some good but all in all this minimalistic living feels more freeing than I thought it would. I sit here on the couch, not having to look at clutter or stress about cleaning up! What a treat :D

A few strange things about our apartment compared to living in Europe and North America? 
-No ovens in older buildings! Our landlord was kind enough to buy us a brand new counter top oven, very nice of him! But having no oven? A little strange to my cake loving tasty buds... 
-There is a back door in the kitchen that is just an open gate that you can lock, no windows or closed door, that leads to the laundry area that is kind of like a balcony, so basically the kitchen is in the 'open'. 
-We have a Drink machine in the lobby, in case you run out of cold drinks.
-I don't think there is a time limit here as to when you can make noise, I noticed our neighbour the other day vacuuming at 11.30pm (in Germany, if you are considerate and don't want complaints within a short while, you leave that till the next day)
-Most buildings have guards. Even though Singapore is considered super safe, there is always someone just chilling at the front smiling and waving at you. 
-The buildings are well kept, the greenery is always watered and shaped
-Every apartment door has an extra ledge where you leave your shoes before entering (LOVE this) 
-Once every two weeks they go around buildings (this is a law) and smoke out any mosquitos, to keep dengue fever at bay
-Most Condos come with pools... that one isn't strange, just freaking awesome :D

Life in Singapore still feels surreal, as if I am on a long vacation waiting to go back home, I've heard that it takes our heart about 6 months to follow our mind...

I hope you are enjoying fall for me! I will now hop in the pool and swim like there is no tomorrow.

Toodles!